Public Speaking - Does Faking It Really Make It?

Published by admin | Filed under Writing and Speaking

Are you watching “The Next Food Network Star” on the Food channel?

Well, let me fill you in. This is a reality show in which 10-15 chefs complete to have their very own cooking show on the Food Network. All of these chefs are judged not just on how they cook but on their ability to shine like a good TV star should.

On the first or second show of the season, one of the chefs, Tommy, couldn’t stop his hands from shaking as he served his bouillabaisse. It was obvious that he was really nervous. So, at the time of the evaluation, just before they kicked someone off, one of the judges told Tommy, “Hey, even if you’re nervous, don’t show it. Don’t let us see you sweat.”

Basically, he told him to fake it.

My stance has always been don’t fake anything. Be real, be yourself, and don’t try to hide anything from your audience. Why? Because you will split your energy and attention and create three times more work for yourself by trying to put on an act AND speak your message at the same time.

But more importantly, the fake-it-until-you-make-it approach only reinforces the myth that you aren’t enough as you are. And it is this myth that causes the fear and anxiety around speaking in public in the first place.

But are there times when it is appropriate to fake it? I suppose so.

Auditioning

If you’re auditioning for a big role, like the Next Food Network Star, go ahead and fake it. Because, in a way, you are auditioning to be someone else. You’re auditioning for a role. So, in this instance, your ability to fake it might be an asset rather than a liability.

But when you are speaking, you aren’t auditioning. You already have the part. And that part is being you, being real, being honest and saying it like it is.

When You’re Sick or Out of Your Mind

If you’re sick as a dog, or you’ve just received horrible news, and you have a speech to give, you never want to unload your bad mood onto your audience. In that case, put on a happy face, and say to yourself, “It’s Showtime, folks!”

But you can still be you. You can even tell the audience what’s up without apologizing or making excuses or breaking down. Sometimes stating the obvious can be a big relief to you and your audience, because if you’re feeling really bad, chances are they know something is off. Might as well just say, “Wow, I caught this doozy of a cold and it’s making my head spin” without using it as an excuse or apologizing.

Before, Not During

The best time to fake it is when preparing for your speech, not during it.

Take some time to fake it in your imagination. Close your eyes and imagine being in front of your audience feeling fabulous and on fire. Practice in your mind those qualities and feelings you want to have when you are speaking.

By using your imagination in this way, you connect to your own inner confidence that already exists within you. You’re practicing being connected to it, having it when you speak. So, you’re not so much faking it as you are calling it up from within you.

So, there are times when you’re best option is to fake it. But why fake it when you can honestly and genuinely feel completely confident, no matter what?

If you’d like to find out how to be completely confident any time you are expressing yourself in any way, sign up for my free monthly e-zine, Becoming Fearless here: http://www.unconditionalconfidence.com

You can also learn the three power tools for feeling confident and creating a magnetic connection in all your communications with the “Engage Your Audience” CD.

Nancy Tierney teaches entrepreneurs how to speak in public with confidence, ease and their own kind of charisma. You can discover how to be completely confident any time you are expressing yourself in any way by going to: http://www.unconditionalconfidence.com

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